Satan’s Spawn

It’s official – the parental unit known as “Mom” is Satan personified. The woman has no heart, not one once of sympathy for drunken behaviour. Not one! I was in physical pain this morning. The after effects of Veuve were clearly marked by my smudged mascara across my face and inside out peejays. You would think that she would understand that a tart needs her beauty sleep (read: recovery form drunken debaucherious night out) cannot be achieved with the measly 4 hours I got…

The woman dragged me out of bed at bloody 4:30am this morning to go to gym. The cracker is that not only did I actually go, with paramount swearing, but I did a 30 minutes weight training session AND (yes there’s more…) a 40 minute walk. All I could think about was: left, right, left, right…

Although I love my Mom scheit loads she is officially an evil, evil woman. The anti-Christ, the domestic version of the devil Wears Prada, the Armageddon of my life!

The after effect of her bloody “good intentions” as she put it is that I am officially deeply fucked (DF) and incapable of… Oh fuck it I am just incapable today!